FOUR REASONS WHY ZIM HIP HOP FANS SUCK

A great number of Zimbabweans are deserving of this title but before we go any further, you should know this; It’s not a flattering one. When it comes to music, a lot of people want to be online fans only, they will “like” their favourite artist’s status, they will comment ever so rowdily but do absolutely nothing beyond just that. It’s that friend who only hears that song on radio, or on a friends phone or see’s it on a machine, is quick to whip out their USB cable, a handy memory card or switch on their Bluetooth to get that song, but they NEVER actually make an effort to download it themselves. If you are that one person who always confirms attendance on events but are never seen at the Big Chill, or whichever, if all you do is “like” links but do not have any download history on your phone or PC whatsoever…Then you are as good as those guys who stalk a girl because she has a nice profile pic, and are dumb enough to religiously register your “LIKE” on a comment such as “my tummy is sore”… yes you, YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A FACEBOOK FAN!

This weekend at the Harare gardens, a large number of LOCAL Dancehall artists’ performed at show that had been tagged the ‘Battle of the ghettos’ the place was alive till after four o’clock in the morning. We asked ourselves, how come this hardly happens for Zim-Hip Hop. Most of the time, we run to blame the artists for not trying hard enough, once we are done, we blame the promoters, and if we stop crying about them we go on and pull the ‘hip hop doesn’t have any cooperate support’ line. Now as we happily point our fingers to different stakeholders we forget the proverbial thumb pointing back at us. Here are some of the problems we have with Zim Hip Hop Fans

We always Cry but Never Buy

How many of you who are staunch fans of say, FewKings bought a copy of “The Feeling Aint fair”. Yes we get it that they put it up for download but, you like them so much and you SUPPORT LOCAL MUSIC’ don’t you? How many of copped a disc? How many of you are incessantly complaining about how The MMT-LP is not spread all around the CBD? Yes, we get that they could've done better but more than half of you are in the CBD every day and you just can’t run to Eastgate, the post office or maybe for others Sam Levi or Avondale to get it?  We love having our word on beef, on pictures, on videos, on sex tapes and on songs, we all love being mini bloggers but we still can’t take that $1-5 and buy a CD!

We are top class snobs

We would much rather attend a show with a foreign artist on the line up first before we go and support our own. We somehow think we are better than our own damn countrymen. To top it all off, we are so choosy when it comes to venues. For an example, how many of you would attend a show at The Harare Gardens (Unless foreigners or really rich people endorse it first i.e. HIFA) as opposed to 7 arts. We always feel so entitled to royal treatment so much we want our artists to pull off a Madison Square Gardens show so that we may go. What we forget is that, sometimes it’s not about how classy the venue is, Is it central? Yes, are the hiring charges reasonable? Yes, is it accessible? Yes! That is why some of your artist may choose the rather not so up town venue as compared to another. But you being you, got too much swag right, you would never go a to place that already has a stage built just for musical shows because you are too superstar to pay $5 for your local hip hopper right. You would rather pay $15 for a South African who will give you one hour’s worth of backtracking…where…at the Harare Gardens!

We are stingy, we think Internet is enough

Well it isn’t! We just said in  our opening statements that it isn’t. Do the math, your average producer may charge an artist anything between, $50 and $800 for one song. The artist has to fork out that amount of money eight to twenty one times to come up with a mixtape or album. That makes it on average $450 to $6400 given that we are working with an eight track album. That’s just for the studio time, we haven’t factored in the amount of money spent travelling up and down from home to studio, the amount of money spent printing cd’s, paying for the internet to post links that you wont  click on because “ah well, I’d rather get that [PLACE AMERICAN RAPPERS NAME HERE] album. (mind you, that rapper will only come to Zim when the rest of the world doesn’t like him anymore). After that, the artist has bills to pay and because he has a life too, he has to look presentable to you guys as we all know Zimbabweans love criticising artists on how cheap their dressing looks. After all is said and done, when the artist decides to only stream their music but not actually have it available for download we run out of steam and not care about the album at all. So because you are oh so economical  with your measly couple of dollars, the artist decides to organise a show so he can get some money out of his artistry, then comes the next problem…

We never show up

Album releases, parties, festivals, or just shows, we love saying we are going, but never really go. When the weekend is all said and done, our artist would have had a handful of their friends showing up. Some of the fans would have got free tickets and left early because, somehow its empty. Every single time the artist has to pull a “thanks for the love fam” line coz really he is greatful that he at least a quarter of the people who said they would attend actually did attend. When the absentees, review the show the next morning,  we run to blame the marketing, but forget that, its their marketing that you lied to and said you would attend, the marketing actually did a good job because, you did know about the show, the charge, the venue and what not did you not?. We then say that there is no cooperate support but forget that big money only comes where there are significant numbers to invest in. Ask dancehall fans, when there is show, they all go, when cooperates see this, they invest. But hip hop fans DONT go, when cooperates see this, they WONT take out a cent! So who is the problem, your artist for having a fake facebook fan or you the fan, for only being a fan…on facebook.

So change your ways, be more appreciative, more supportive to any form of Hip Hop, buy the clothing, buy the CD's. Go to the shows. Dont be backseat about it. 

PUSH