Girls used to namedrop our local rappers...make sure they called you Tendai while the rest of us called you Tehn. Now they never admit in public that they know you guys..Hip Hop. Deceased
Hello Mr / Miss Rapper, PUSHZW has not posted any new blog post of late. Are we apologetic,eeeh slightly. However, we shall be sincere, its not totally our fault. We would love to tell you about how blogging about YOUR career is something we do late night or weekends when YOU will be turning up on cheap vodka and with overly made up girls who lie about the HOTNESS of YOUR JAM buuuuut...This is NON-PAYING! Its OUR DATA, TIME, EFFORT...what do we get from this? At best, free tickets to The Zim Hip Hop awards if we are fortunate enough to get nominated for re-tweeting your data file links to less than pleasing badly mastered material. Worse off, the Hip Hop awards are a pain to go through too, if its not the late starts, its the bad sound, if that's not the problem, its the organization..we could go on..but long story short, We ain't getting jack but satisfaction of YOU actually making it in the Music Industry. Trust us, we are really more eager for you succeed than you think. Just because there is no post about your new "hit" do not assume it means we didn't listen.
But here's WHY we didn't blog your s*#@
Lets start with some of the leaders of the game, Junior Brown , Marcques, we will never forgive your performances at the AKA show. Junior Brown gave us an accapella performance. Accapella. Are you telling me I was there to watch Junior Brown go Karaoke?? I'm sure that was also an eye opener as to how much music you DON'T have and we thought your Shoko performance would have fixed that. Dai kufunga kwebenzi nhai? Marques had who on stage at the AKA show? singing? oh ok. Lets go to the music they did drop since then, "Maria" and "Who got Next"...sigh.. Breezy, we would have expected a video for Maria, for an example, go to a darkened room, have a light bulb swinging, illuminating your depressed face Mr Brown, while you sit on a stool and sing Maria Maria Mariaaaaaa! You can thank us later for the idea! Our point, more could have been done on that song, it could have been promoted more, hell,we know Zifm will play you anyway, how about a video, cinematic, lyric video, ANYTHING. Lets not even talk about Morning Glory, that was addressed by Mr Zunguza in the "state of the nation address" jam Marcques "leaked.." well, They say it was leaked. It was okaaay, just didn't really move us. Here's whats funny, HE STILL HASN'T DROPPED NUTHIN EITHER! We don't hear him featuring on songs anymore.. That album better drop fast because we hear the word IRRELEVANCE is starting to get louder than the clickety clack of the keyboard as we type.
Which gets us to one of our biggest reasons for not talking about your s*#@, Dear artist, your music doesn't appeal to us, not only is it un-entertaining, it doesn't do ANYTHING to us, it lacks the WOW factor, it doesn't provoke us to be happy, or sad, or hyper or to be proud of you! So yes, even if you do release a follow up dope jam, we wont give it a second thought because YOU didn't give much of it either when you dropped your first jam. A lot of Zim Hip Hop artistes and R & B artistes know how to rap and sing, How to make a song, however? A BIG FAT NO. If the studio that you record in does not have studio monitors, get your stuff mastered elsewhere, if it takes a day to get a song done, dusted and out..don't send it to us, have other bloggers talk about you s*#@. Sometimes we cant even hear what these artistes are saying, the songs have no structure, the verses are boring and so much noise...pure and utter WHACKERY!
Lets be honest, 2013 is soon going to be three years ago, I bet you Tehn Diamond will still be performing Happy (first heard of in 2011 at the awards and won an award Zim Hip Hop laaater), Madrinks the remix..and having us go through that awful journey of love (pills and potions blah blah frikkin blah...just don't sing that s*#@ )! Mr Diamond, we miss you! the SOTG you, the really cocky NON SINGING YOU. A lot of people said Tehn used to be Mr Untouchable and lots didn't like his attitude,in hindsight, He shouldve stayed that way. He isn't cool no more! All the beads and the clothes you always recycle on videos and stuff don't fit the COOL we want you to have as THE CHOSEN ONE for ZIM! Tehn had lots of swag when He was MR SOTG both in his music and as the image of Tehn Diamond, I kid you not, we don't care what the economy is like, I shouldn't always see my favorite rapper wear the same outfit! But lets take it to the music, "Sumudza Gumbo"...bruuuh! I have never heard a greater wastage of lyrics than on that song. WE JUST CANT BEAR IT. Really though, that song was as tired as the Simbatagz and Iceprince "Dont Leave Me Remix". All that hype for thaaaat SHOW TIME!! .. no man! "Daijes in the Sky", such a nice title, but Tehn..singing isn't doing it for us. Maybe the fans soon to be hounding our mailboxes like it. Hell, the song hasn't dropped like the Perfect Tehn, we should call it "THE PERFECT WHEN??!!"
Matter of fact, we listened to TRK's The Come Up 2 and we couldn't help but think that if Tehn had stayed as Tehn (Mr SOTG Tehn), he would have sounded as nice as TRK on that Mixtape but alas, he had to get the beads.... Side note, we think, The Come Up (the first one) wasn't as yay! The sequel to that showed a lot of growth, we might just review it, Growth and progression is what we like, unlike the next set of rappers we wanna talk about
WHERE THE HELL DID MMT GO? You know what, Marcques was right, ONLY ONE rapper in MMT is still a rapper, MC Cut, as to if he will ever really get thaaat song, (remember the wow factor) is really up to him. Maybe he is happy introducing other rappers on stage, We would rather hear him introduced! Such talent, such a crew, they revived the game...now??
Lets go to some of the recent happenings, Kapital K dropped an EP, You see Mr Keezy, we think you are one of the nicest, but it always seems as if every song has to be about bottles/Sex with Unamed Peoples Girlfriends/ Clubs in Cape Town/ ...repeat. We listened to the whole EP... and didn't blog about it, why? loud as it was, only one song really did it for us, that would make for a very bad post. How collaborations or working with producers who bring the best out of you like SimbaTagz on "high" because as far as we are concerned that's the only hit you got...or do you want us to go to the days of Lil' Keith
The team that makes the music that most people will "say they enjoy"...SHOWTIME. the stable with the best pre-release grind. No one works as hard as Showtime on social Media music hyping. and they are not afraid to invest time into it to. This is of course when they don't pull as surprise immediate EP/Mixtape drop that 20 people download. We remember following the road to Reverb 7's "Friends Season 1" - then the digital booklet it came with! damn! that put most international CD packages to shame. Hats off to you. Showtime does however utterly suck and post release. They never talk about a song for more than 3 days after its release. it's like they have the attention spans of 3-year olds on a sugar high. Some of the music they released into the wind had the chance to change the face of young Zimbabwean music. I guess they are too busy being cool to notice huh?
Team Bho, we have a confession, your IMAGE and grind.. AMAAAAZING, whether other bloggers or podcasters like talking smack about your sneakers we don't care. However, the music yall make is just sometimes boring. You guys spend more time topless and exhibiting your dirty innerwear than perfecting your craft. What really saves you are your performances and visibility, hell they are as visible as Anonzi Xndrs relationship advice hashtags, we wish he would drop more hits than hashtags though. Team Rehab used to be the heart beat of Zim hip hop but now.. [insert crickets chirping here]....
Lets take a moment to talk about Bulawayo rappers lest they start dedesaring, kuyema, being cry babies about How Harare this Harare that. Nxa imusic yenyu ingachazi mafethu kayichazi! (if your music ain't entertaining, it ain't entertaining). Don't hate the player, hate the game, or just PLAY BETTER! For example, these guys play better, Yung Tyran, Calvin, Naboth Rizla, POY (yes, KeSummer was dope). Those ones, we like...a lot! Go through our blogs, you will see them. However, whats with always calling out Stunner / Pokello on cyphas though, is there nothing else to rap about? If Calvin can get played on air then murder people on their own jams (yes XQ ) then, get one of Africa's BEST RAPPERS to feature on a jam, drop an EP, then an album, damn right you can! Stop complaining, Bulawayo has better Hip Hop than Harare right now anyway, grind smarter..not harder magents!
KiddActive, GZE, Calvin, Meyniak, Sharky, Team Bho, thank you guys for keeping some semblance of hope in the game, Peakay is definitely not a rapper anymore...He last rapped when Ill Ceey was secular..damn...before he became the mature Courtney Antipas. We dare them to nominate him as one!
We think that FTR and Abnorm are a good working couple from Blow Hard Records, we have never liked the name but the only thing that went wrong on Love Begets Love was when Abnorm seemed to roll over his words on some lines. It wasn't perfect,that jam was fire, just the finer bits guys,THE FINER BITS, so yeah, we didn't blog about it, Yes, That and Killin em, which was a twitter name for so long that Mr FTR had to take it down. Ftr and Abnorm make great sounding music in terms of quality but how many time do the weak raps have to get saved by a feature? Although FTR killed it on the Marukaz remix. However, He is just like Junior Brown and not dropping an album or a song, we really don't care anymore. Damn right you killed em, you killed em with silence and meh...
We had to use strong words on a femcee before we posted this, She had asked us "what will it take for us to blog about her new jam"
So lets get this straight ladies, DONT EVER COMPETE against other girls, compete against the whole game! From Drake to bloody Lexxii Alejai. Lets STOP using the word femcee (its now the F-word).We have always stressed that with how music is accessible everywhere, one has to fight for space on my and everyone else's playlist as we have become very trigger happy with the delete button! Zim rappers have to STOP making mediocre music, we loved that after #SHOKOFESTIVAL, Joe Black, went on a rant about how we need to be honest about how crappy or how good we are, MisRed has constantly stressed about the importance of perfecting our own music. Why do I have the latest Game but not your track, simple, your stuff sounds like it was recorded on a phone and the rhymes are as old school as Noble Stylz's fashion sense! Fight to be on our playlists, fight to be on radio, not by bribing DJ's coz that don't work, but by being DOPE! Stop telling each other lies, have different people listen to your song before you release it, don't put us on no whatsapp broadcast list, we don't download sometimes, JUST BE GOOD, Here's an exercise, play your favorite international rappers song to the end, then play your song, if they are at par, YOU ARE READY, if they aren't, quit Hip Hop or WORK TOWARDS BEING BETTER!
I bet you guys are gonna be arguing about who deserves awards this year. If I was Beefy or whoever is running it this year...I wouldn't give anyone anything...except maybe Calvin.
In plane English, this is what we hope people take from this post
Master the Art of Making a good Song/ Album
We flock to shows where rappers from outside our country rap in languages we don't know. Why? Its because they make good music. Its not about the language, its the whole package. Its not about where you are from, its how good the song is. Pass the song to your Ex girlfriend and or boyfriend, have a DJ listen to it, hear what they say, improve! Sound changes every year, try to not get lost in experimentation though, RAISE THE BAR! Make it count, make it nice, If you are paying money for a beat, get the files too, make noise if your producer didn't master it right, play it on a radio with no sub-woofers, listen to every detail, correct the flaws, make the fan happy!
Image is Everything
Vanity is a bad thing, looking the part is an obligation. We have met lots of personalities and they look the part. When you see Ruvheneko Parirenyatwa ANYWHERE... she got swag!! You instantly want to associate with her, Tatea Da MC, actually looked like a rapper, SWAG! Ammara Brown, Shingi Mau Mau, Team Bho, they ALWAYS looks the part in public. Once you choose to be a musician, you have to wear the uniform 24/7. Whether you are rehearsing, walking down the street, in a kombi or wherever, you need to look presentable because we really do judge a book by its cover.Lets stop looking like struggling artists. Most album artworks have improved and we are great full but please INVEST IN YOUR IMAGE, its an extension of your music!
Don't go quiet for too long, we will forget you
Whoever idea it was to not drop content, fooled yall! Lets say you make an album for a sound that's popular in 2015, you decide that the timing ain't right, so you wait for three years and drop in 2018, the sound would have changed, fans would have grown up, then you complain that we don't blog your S*#@, we mightz actually do it, as a #ThrowBackThursday. Next thing, content makes you stay relevant, if you aren't going to drop an album, make it a mix tape, take other peoples beats, rap on them! Feature more, collaborate. You wont get cooperate sponsorship because you were hot THREE YEARS AGO!
Performances can make or break your career
A lot of people who perform Hip Hop at say HIFA, are people we don't really know, but they turn the place up, eg, True Vibe Nation. They make sure that their performances are epic! In an age where piracy is killing digital sales, performances and shows have become the cash cow for musicians. Now, if you don't work on your performance, you don't practice, you show up to shows late, its always back tracks, your movement is wrong, then don't send us a press release to your weak stuff. We wont tell our respected readers where you are because YOU might give US a bad name!
If you got to this part, we would like you to know that we shall and never use profanity in our posts, lest the title misleads you, here's what it really meant for us, read between the lines and improve your craft, understand these four bars
"We know the post might have been long /
The language a bit too strong /
But Your music really sucks
Thats why we wont blog about your s*#@
